The Only Reason People Divorce

Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins. (Proverbs 10:12)

1love (noun \ˈləv\)
: a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person
: attraction that includes sexual desire : the strong affection felt by people who have a romantic relationship
: a person you love in a romantic way (

 Poorly Defined

For the western civilization the above definition is the generally accepted definition of love, and if you accept this definition then you are very likely to be divorced. Let me be blunt, this is garbage, and it is not close to a proper definition of real love. You may be thinking, ‘Who do you think you are, trying to redefine a word?’, and my response to that is, how is “love” working out for you?

The Grandest Concept on the Planet

 Love should be difficult to put into words, and when it is put into words, its concept should be grandiose. When we see videos of soldiers surprising their wives, children, or parents by returning home from war at an unexpected time, our eyes well up with tears and our hearts melt. When we here that someone risked, or gave, their life to save someone else, it make us glad to be a part of the human community. When we hear about a spouse who has decided to forgive her mate, or a person who has remained faithful to their spouse who has become disabled, we hope to experience that type of love in our lifetime.  Love is action. This is why the word charity replaces the word love in the King James Version of the Bible. The word charity carries with it the concept of taking action on someone’s behalf because of love, and not for any other reason. The fact that other versions of the Bible have replaced the word charity with love actually causes something to be lost in the translation.

A Lack of Love is the Only Reason Divorce Occurs

When people are married under the currently accepted definition of love they are setting themselves up for failure. People end up divorcing because they don’t love each other anymore, or because my spouse forced me to have an affair, or we just cannot get along. I have often heard it said that the number one reason that people get divorced is money, and I have no problem believing that money is the number one excuse for people getting divorced, but a lack of love is always the real reason. It may be that one spouse is showing true love, but for the spouse at fault if they truly loved they would remain in their marriage.


God is Love

My concept of love is not one that I have decided to make up on my own. The Bible says that God is love, and if that is true then the only appropriate place for us to gather our definition of love is from God Himself. The Bible teaches that we know love because Jesus was willing to die for us, and we know from the Bible that He died for us while we were His enemies. If God is love, and the way He showed His love was by giving His Son for our sins, then how can we say that love is a feeling that can come and go based on whether or not a person makes us feel good, or whether or not we are sexually attracted to a person? True love is a person who is actually willing to love someone for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer till death do they part.

How do you Live with Your Spouse

 You live with your spouses and all of their flaws by choosing to love them. I’m not talking about lust, or admiration, or any sort of feeling, because those things can come and go depending on either of your particular mood or some unexpected health issue. You will be able to live with your spouse if you marry someone who you are willing to love and who understands what love really is, and is willing to love you. Are you frustrated in your marriage right now? If you read this and consider leaving them because they do not truly love you then you have proved that you do not truly love them. It’s not too late, you can find peace in true love. Love is a choice, but it is not an option. If you have ever truly loved anyone then you have never stopped loving them. It is as possible to fall out of love as it is to make God stop existing by insisting that He does not exist.


1 Corinthians 13 (The true definition of love.)

1Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. 2And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. 3And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

4Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 5Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; 6Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 7Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

8Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away. 9For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. 10But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away. 11When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. 12For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. 13And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.


Are You in an Abusive Relationship?

For those who are being physically abused, or know that their children are being abused, please do not remain in that situation. In order to properly love yourself, your children, and even your spouse you must get out of that situation. Seek out help because there are people in the world who love you who have never even met you, but they are ready to help you right now.


Image by: George Hodan

About robertkennedymitchell

Christian. Husband. Dad. Pastor.
This entry was posted in Christian, Devotion, Divorce, Jesus, Love, Marriage and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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